Which Is Better, Outlining Or Organic Writing?

To outline, or not to outline, that is a fiction-writers battle as old as fiction-writing itself. Books on writing are as polarized about the subject as authors.

Julia Cameron pretty much paved the path of organic writing in her famous book, The Artist’s Way: A Spiritual Path to Higher Creativity. Although I don’t think she called the process “organic writing” she showed how anyone can channel their own creativity into writing without using an outline.

On the other hand, Larry Brooks latest book Story Engineering trounces on the process of organic writing, calling it “…nothing short of insane,” and stating that “A scene written organically – without a mission – is already being fitted for a casket.”

So who’s right? I’ve tried organic writing myself several times. One result was my first published short story, Big Game which sold on its first submission, and has reviewed quite well. Another result was a disasterous mess of dark fantasy pseudo-manuscript that shall not be named here, and made me wonder if Larry Brooks was right.

I did some research on plotting methods and the comparison of outlining vs organic writing. Here’s a look at the differences between these two methods and my answer to the question of which is better.

What is Organic Writing? (aka ‘Pantsing’)

Organic Writing is writing free-form, without plan or structure, and no real concern about where the writing is going. Check out free writing or automatic writing. The visual equivalent would be an artist doodling until they stumble upon an image. The musical equivalent would be ‘jamming’ in which a person or group simply plays until some musical structure jumps out of the ether and manifests into a song.

Some fiction writers use organic writing as a tool to flush out a scene, a character, or even a story.  They write to find out what their character is like, or where the story or scene leads. The author just… writes, letting a spontaneous flow of words rush through them. The author might be as surprised as anyone else about what hits the page. This is sometimes called discovery or exploratory writing.

I call this exploratory writing tactic “Chasing The Muse.” You let the muse out of the bottle and see where she goes. Sometimes she won’t move even if you prod her with a Tazer. That’s called writer’s block. Sometimes she plods along, (which is where this method also gets jokingly referred to as ‘plodding’ as opposed to ‘plotting’) feeding you a stream of words, and you write it all down.

If you’re lucky the muse runs, and it’s your job as an author to keep up. If it’s 2AM and you’re dead tired but you can’t stop because you’ve been possessed by the spirit of an amazing writer with words flowing faster than you can type them… congratulations, you’ve experienced true organic writing.

Some people call this “Pantsing” which is short for “Seat of the Pants Writing.”  Mr. T from The A-Team would call it being “On The Jazz.” Some people call it “insane” and begging for a rejection letter. Those opposed to organic writing suggest a different method – Outlining.

What is Outlining?

Outlining is the method of defining the structure of a story before writing any of it. The analogy is often made to building a house. Planning the structure down to the nearest sixteenth of an inch is crucial if you want to build the house with maximum efficiency and minimum waste.

Likewise with story construction, if you plan out how the story will start, end, and all the pieces between, then when you actually sit down to write the story, you know not only what goes where, but why.

There are various systems of outlining. Some people use notecards. Some use the Outline View in Microsoft Word. Some use the Snowflake Method software by Randy Ingermanson. Some just have the story structure in their head.

Regardless of how they do it, the primary difference between outliners and organic writers is that outliners write from A to B, and organic writers write from A.

Which writing method is better?

Which method is better? Let’s take a look at several different aspects of writing that can be affected:

Speed

In both methods, you will do lots of work up front on something that influences the final product but will not necessarily be part of it.

Outliners like to point out that much of the organic writer’s work will be edited or cut later. This is true. This is why organic writing is sometimes called “discovery writing” in which case you are discovering the outline.

But isn’t it also true that you’ll spend a lot of time on outlining? And once the outliner’s work is done, isn’t the organic writer thousands of words ahead?

It’s impossible to say which is a faster method for you. There are just too many variables. How fast do you outline? How fast do you write? How detailed an outline do you need before you start writing? You’ll have to answer these questions for yourself, probably by experimenting with both methods to see which is faster for you. And, as my own experience has shown, which method is faster could change on a project-by-project basis.

Quality

Which method results in the best quality writing? Outliners make a good case that your writing will flow better if you know where it’s going before you start. But some argue that outlining results in contrived writing and wooden characters, and organic writing begets more natural prose. I once heard someone remark that if the ending doesn’t surprise the author, it won’t surprise anyone else either.

Your mileage may vary. It’s impossible to say which method will result in better quality writing for you.

You see where this is going, don’t you?

Difficulty

Which method is more difficult? It might be more meaningful to consider which method is more fun. If the thought of outlining makes you feel as though you are strapping the muse into a straitjacket… if the constraints of getting from point A to point B give you writer’s block… if the thought of writing thousands of words that might be reworked for hours and/or thrown away makes you reach for the liquor cabinet…

Again, this is a subjective measurement that only you can make for yourself. It’s impossible to say which method will be easier or harder for you.

Really Zero, stop screwing around and tell us! Which method is better?

Sorry folks – after all that analysis, it turns out the whole thing is a trick question. In the logic field of Philosophy, this is what’s known as a False Dichotomy – focusing on two possibilities when there are actually others. In this case, the question of “Which Is Better?” implies that the two can’t both be used.

The truth is you can use both. The wicked truth is that you have to use both.

Structuring and Organic Writing are ingredients, and finding the best possible mix for you is like trying to find the right combination of Jagermeister and Red Bull in your penultimate, writing Jag Bomb.

Let’s take another look at both methods, and see what we missed.

Structuring, Revisited

The structural method sounds efficient on the surface. Once the structure is complete, you won’t waste many words filling that structure. Every word you put into that structure will be used to make the story go forward as it should. Very little rework, very little waste. Right?

Look again.

What exactly are you putting INTO that structure? Well, you know you have to get the scene from plot point A to plot point B, but when it finally comes time to fill that space, how do you do it? What do you fill it with?

That’s right, Organic Writing. At some point you have to stop drawing the outline and start filling it in.

And what happens if you fill that space as directed and when you’re done the scenes are flat? Boring? Contrived? What then? You rewrite.

But what if you rewrite those scenes a dozen times, and they still don’t sing? What if you find the structure is limiting your writing? You restructure.

What happens if your muse starts coloring outside the lines? What happens if your characters won’t behave? What happens if you find a plot hole big enough to sail an aircraft carrier through? What happens if you start writing from point A to point B and discover you’ve ended up at point C, by way of F, Y and the color Blue? What if point C is a far more interesting place than B?  Now what do you do?

If you want to keep point C in the story, you’ll have to revisit the structure and adjust everything! You’ll have to change all your foreshadowing, and maybe even the ending… oh boy. Maybe it’s better just to forget you ever discovered point C, get the train back on the structure track and rewrite your way to point B? Rewrite or restructure?

Not quite as easy as you thought, eh? Don’t be fooled. Good writing is hard work.

Organic Writing, Revisited

The organic writing method sounds pretty on the surface. Pretty easy too. So easy in fact, that many writers think they can shortcut the process by organically writing a bestseller out of the air.  Don’t be fooled. Good writing is hard work.

You’re going to throw away or rework a lot of that organic writing. You’ll need to go back and check that the plot flows, and the pacing and that all subplots resolve, and you’ll have to go back and check your foreshadowing and make sure all scenes are leading toward an ending you weren’t even aware of when you started…

Wait a minute! What exactly are you doing to that organic writing?

Surprise! You’re putting structure on it. Yes, you can structure your work after it’s written. And you’d better, unless you are journaling or writing poetry.

The Question, Revisited

Every author outlines, whether they do it intentionally, intuitively, subconsciously, naturally or artificially.

Every author writes organically, unless they are writing technical manuals for the military.

Those who outline have to fill their structures with organic writing. Those writing organically have to rework their organic writing to check/create/enforce a structure.

Without a structure, you don’t have a story, you have a dictionary run through a blender. Without organic writing you have a sterile description of a story.

The questions are not “which method is best?” or “should you outline?” The questions are “how do you outline?” and “how much outlining do you do?”

The Middle Path

Structure is a necessary component of ALL fiction, but whether you apply a structural outline before, after, or even during the creative writing process is not important. In other words, you should have a structure to your finished story, but how you get that outline is up to you. Some authors need to discover the story as they go. Some authors need an outline before they can start.

Between the two extremes are an entire purgatory of options that are overlooked by most authors. What if you organically wrote a story structure? What if you loosened up the story structure, and instead of putting the muse in a straitjacket, you got one of those dog leashes that allows some play before setting a boundary? What if you designed multiple ending structures and wrote each one organically to see which was best?

What works best for me is to bounce back and forth between organic writing and outlining. I write organically for a while, then take a step back to look at the big picture, and adjust the outline as necessary. Here is a link to a process called phase drafting which is very similar to what I’ve learned to do on my own. Yes, I rewrite a lot. No, it’s not easy. Need I say it again? Good writing is hard work.

The method that will work best for *you* is… whatever works best for you. If you want to improve your writing, read about organic writing in The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron and read about story structure in Story Engineering by Larry Brooks. But don’t let Julia Cameron, Larry Brooks or even me tell you how to write. Learn the ingredients and then mix your own drink to taste.

Part of the adventure of becoming a writer is making the craft your own, and experimenting to find a method that feels good to you and helps you release your best writing.

Buying Local isn’t just a way for hipsters to make themselves feel better about their consumeristic behavior patterns. There’s another major benefit of buying local that many people don’t realize.

An Author’s Incomes

As a member of the MNSpec Writer’s Group, I see many fellow authors struggling for months or even years with their stories,  laboring to make their novels the very best that they can. Despite what Na-no-wri-mo would have you believe, novels take a long time to write well. Musicians and Filmmakers would agree with Authors that good art takes a lot of time, resources, and a lot of physical, mental and emotional energy.

When you finally finish that sure-to-be-a-bestseller, when you finally see the hard copy on the bookstore shelf or view the listing online, there’s more than just money soon to be coming your way.  In fact, there are several different ‘incomes’ that you receive as an author.

There’s the satisfaction of a completed project. Fan mail. Reviews. Stalkers.

Death threats from political/religious factions will start up, but the death threats from your agent and publisher will stop, so that’s a wash.

But one of the incomes that will always bring you a warm fuzzy is the simple action of selling your book to someone.

Signing a book for someone, dedicating it to them specifically and handing it to them directly is a perk of being an author that few people will ever get to enjoy. This is an invisible currency, but every bit as valuable as cash.

I had the opportunity to experience this myself firsthand. Handing out copies of The Blackness Within (a compilation containing my first published short story, Big Game) to my friends and family was a thrill in itself, but there was more:

“Aren’t you going to sign it? You have to sign it!”

They didn’t just want my story. They wanted it signed by the author.

I’ve been on the Please-Sign-This-Book-For-Me side of the street many times before, so I know exactly how that feels. But the feeling that comes from autographing books for other people – part humility, part pride, part hack and part superstar – is a rare blend. Maybe famous authors get used to it, but for unfamous local authors like myself who are still amazed that they actually got their work published, much less that anyone would want to read it…

The sale is nice and all, but the bonus compensation of Gratitude and Praise are part of a writer’s income that makes me feel good about what I’ve done. That it was actually worth the countless late nights, lunches and weekends spent slaving over a hot keyboard when I could have been doing… well, pretty much anything else.

Supporting Your Local Arts and Artists

If you really love books, then check out local authors at readings and book signings.  Dreamhaven Books in Minneapolis has a continuing series of monthly readings by local Speculative Fiction authors, and you’ll see plenty of regulars from the MNSpec Writer’s Group in attendance.

Sure, you could jump online and buy the book right now. Or you could go to the used bookstore and get it dirt cheap. But think about it. The author gets nothing from your purchase of a second-hand book, and you’ve also denied them the satisfaction of interacting with the people who read their work. You’ve also denied yourself the experience of meeting the person who made the book possible. Learning what the author is like might make you more (or less) excited about buying their books.

When you buy directly from the author, you not only get the book you wanted, but you’re giving back a lot more than just a purchase. You are casting your vote for the kind of art you want to see in your area.

Best of all, you’ll be able to say that you helped out one of your own local authors, and that you actively support your local arts community.

“It’s All About Sales”

…at least that’s what my friend said. We were talking about web design and web copy writing, but we could just as easily have been talking about writing in general.  It made me wonder about the purpose(s) other writers might have for writing novels. Now I’m certainly not going to turn down cash for my writing, and I don’t know an author who would, but that isn’t the primary reason that I write.

What is it then? Why do I write? You’d think a Philosophy major would have asked themselves that question before typing a single word, but I’d never really thought about it before. Why would anyone voluntarily put themselves through such a notoriously frustrating, unflattering, and poorly-paying field that makes a career in porn sound more rewarding?

Below is the list of seven reasons I could imagine motivating authors to write. There are probably more, but I think I got all the major ones. If you can think of any I missed, toss them in the comments.

It’s probably pretty rare for an author to fall under a single one of these motivations, and there may be different motivations for each story an author writes. More likely it’s some combination of several motivations, even if they’re subconscious ones.

1 – Commercial

My capitalistic friend does have a point. The most obvious answer to the question “Why write novels?” would be, “For the Money” and I wouldn’t be surprised if this was the most popular answer, although anyone who knows anything about the publishing industry should take my advice and buy lottery tickets instead. The dress code is the same but the pay is better, and so are the hours.

I’d lump Charity into this category as well, since it’s work being traded as a gift of some value.

“Making money is art, and working is art and good business is the best art.”

-The Philosophy of Andy Warhol

If there was ever an artist who could have created art solely for commercial purposes, it was Andy Warhol. His New York gallery project The American Supermarket contained works of art laid out like food items in a supermarket (along with the infamous Campbell’s Soup Can painting) which pretty much hits this nail on the head with an aircraft carrier.

Nowadays we have “Commercial Artists” a title people aren’t even ashamed of. A writer example of the commercial artist is called a “Copy Writer” – one who writes advertisement/product/web copy for a living. The fact that this career path exists is proof enough that cash is a major motivation for some authors.

But that ain’t me. Not yet, anyway. I still have a day job, so I have the luxury of not depending on my writing to put food on the table. Believe me, this is a good thing. But it still leaves my core writing motives unanswered, so let’s dig a little deeper…

2 – Fame

Some authors think they can actually get famous by writing. I mean, red carpet famous. I mean, their likeness parodied on The Simpsons famous.

It’s not unreasonable for beginning authors to release their work for free in an attempt to grow their fan base. In fact, it’s the method I use to increase membership in The Cult of Zero, and it works quite well. Giving away free samples of your work will make you more popular. But if you think your writing is going to make you the next Stephanie Meyer or Stephen King: read this and calm down.

I don’t write for fame, and I have no delusions of being the next Neil Gaiman or Amanda Hocking. If I wanted fame, I’d release the home video of me, Sarah Palin and Michelle Bachmann. Ahem. Moving right along…

3 – Informational / Educational

No one pays the writers of the articles on wikipedia. Many of those authors are driven by a desire to teach. To educate. To share information.

Authors of non-fiction must be at least partially motivated by the need to inform or educate others. Even if they have an ulterior Commercial motivations, they simply aren’t going to sell many How To Write the Best Dark Fiction Ever books if they don’t actually inform the audience How To Write the Best Dark Fiction Ever.

Memoirs and biographies (especially auto-biographies) generally fall into this area, unless you’re interesting enough that someone approaches you with a book deal for your life story.

I pepper my writing with factoids, but stories about how to save the world from Giant Carnivorous Poisonous Exploding Spider-Leeches… well, they aren’t generally found the in the “how to” section of the bookstore. (If I’m wrong about this, please drop a link in the comments section.) So this isn’t really a motivation for my writing either. Maybe someday I’ll write a real Demonslayer’s Handbook…

4 – Influential / Persuasive

Some art exists only to front an ulterior motive or agenda. Political and Religious texts that are not objectively written can fall quickly from the Informational / Educational category into this one.  It could be argued that authors who do this are actually Commercially motivated, because they are “selling” an idea or philosophy. I don’t “buy” that. (Pun intended.)

If there’s any influence in my writing, its not intentional. Persuasive writing generally leaves a bad taste in my mouth even if the writing is good, and even if I agree with the agenda being pushed.

Georges Braque said, “Art is meant to Disturb.” He did NOT say, “Art is meant to justify and perpetuate your narrow-minded opinion.”

5 – Aesthetic / Entertainment

Simply put, some people make art just to change the world. They want to make people laugh, or cry, or swoon, or simply “mess with their minds.” Graffiti probably belongs in this category. Can you imagine what the world would be like if all authors only wrote for aesthetic value?

Perhaps this motivation would be better summed up by the word Power. Aesthetic implying power to change the world, and Entertainment implying power to change other humans.

Is this why I write? Not completely. Of course I want my novels to be glittering gems of dark fiction treasure that make women’s toes curl, shots of bestselling urban-fantasy-meth that make men thrust their fists in the air and chant “Hell Yeah!” But if this was the reason I wrote, I’d be writing some cross between James Patterson and Danielle Steele.

6 – Forced / Compelled

Speaking of motivations, there’s plenty of reasons someone might write something they really don’t want to write:

• My boss made me do it.
• My teacher made me do it.
• The Devil made me do it.
• My publishing contract made me do it.
• Someone had to do it.

This covers anyone forced to write at gunpoint, and pretty much all of your business and school writings. It also covers automatic writing and people possessed by evil spirits.  In fact, I recently saw a book that the author said was “…dictated to me by the Creator.” I guess if the Creator dictates a book to you, you’d better write it down. (But you don’t necessarily have to publish it. Just sayin.)

You’ve probably heard about the ‘contractual obligation’ manuscripts some multi-book-deal authors complain about? Those authors might fall into this category, but they won’t get much sympathy from me. It’s like complaining about the payments on your foreign sports car, while the majority of authors are walking. But at least when the commercial motivation fizzles, they have an agent and a publisher with deadlines that will help motivate them to write.

Obviously, this isn’t my main motivation for writing, although I have had stories “haunt” me, and I felt that if I just Got-The-Damn-Story-Out-Of-My-Head I could have some peace. But this is usually during the initial phase of writing a story, so it isn’t my primary motivation.

7 – Because Writing Is Fun

This one seemed so simple I almost missed it. At first blush this seems similar to “forced or compelled” motivation crossed with the “Aesthetic” motivation and  mixed with Rainbows and Vermouth. There’s no shortage of the romanticized visions of authors dreamily constructing their bestselling masterpiece, usually in a very short montage with a soundtrack of hipster music and bright lighting.

Of course this is mostly Bullshit. The real writing process for me takes place in a basement that looks more like the set for a High On Fire video than Beck. No rainbows, and hardly any Vermouth.

But notice I said “mostly” bullshit. There is a small piece of that Fictional Fiction Writer’s World that is non-fiction to me.

I actually enjoy writing.

My stories, with all the doom, gloom, blood, death and disembowelment are, strangely enough, what I call my  “Happy Place.” I enjoy writing dark fiction because it means I get to go to interesting places and hang out with cool people, hideous monsters, unfathomable evil, Exploding Spider-Leeches and chicks with swords.

Call it a sickness if you will, but there’s no cure that I know of. No, not even more cowbell.

Perhaps this motivation would be better labeled as “Escape” which, interestingly, is the same reason many people READ dark fiction.

And there it is. My primary motivation for writing is that I really enjoy it. It’s why I also write song lyrics and blog posts like this one. I wish it paid better. But like I said, if I was doing it for the money, I’d get a second job and buy some lottery tix.

There must be other people out there who simply enjoy writing for its own sake, and not for external motivations. The alternate motivations like fame, money and such are nice if they get fulfilled, but if writing itself gives you pleasure, then the journey is the reward and anything else is a bonus.

Your Thoughts?

What do you think? Am I way off? Can all these different categories be subsumed under Commercial? Or Aesthetic?

Can you add to the list?  Drop your thoughts in the comments below.

You Can’t.

Sorry. You probably came here looking for Tips and Tools. Instead, you found a disturbing Truth:

You can’t become a Great Author.

Before you get angry, you should know that the truth is worse than you think:

No one can become a Great Author.

Now you can get angry.

You’re probably saying that this is not true, and you can rattle off a dozen examples by the last name alone: King, Tolkien, Lovecraft, Gaiman, Rowling, Meyer… People who painted vivid pictures and epic sagas and amazing characters with only some words on a page.

I wanted to become a Great Author, and I read dozens of books that tell you how.  I read books that promise your manuscript can be the gold the interns lust after as they sludge through the slush pile into the thin morning hours.

But it’s all lies.

Avoid Passive Writing, one would say. Watch Your Point of View, says another. Make your protagonist human. Make your villains hateable. Write as much as you can. Write every day. Vary your sentence length. The secret is in the revision. Three-part story structure. Show , don’t tell. Be transparent. Work on your voice…

Lies. None of this will make you a Great Author.

I read the blogs of authors who actually made the book deal.  I read about when they write, and how they write, why they write, and what music they listen to while they write. I read about authors who don’t like their own stories, begrudging cranking out contractually-obligated manuscripts. I read about authors with a successful series of published books behind them and a multi-book contract ahead of them, they still need to hold down a second job, and thank goodness their spouse has a full-time job with medical insurance. They stuff their blogs with handy tips about how you can be a Great Author just like them.

Lies.

I read dark fiction / fantasy books like my own, trying to figure out what makes them good and what makes them suck. I dissected classics like a coroner stumbling through an alien autopsy while drunk and blindfolded, trying to tell one piece from another by touch, taste and smell. All I have left to show are a stack of books I really can’t read anymore.  Like my friend who let me look up her skirt on the school bus,  and now I’ll never see her in the same way again.

Lies.

I could walk over to the bargain bin at Half-Price Books and pick out at least one book neither of us have ever heard of, but it’s better than most of the current rack of Bestsellers at Borders.

Lies.

The Truth about Great Authors

Some of you already see through the veil of deception. It’s semantics. A word-game. The truth is that you can’t CHOOSE to become a Great Author, any more than you can choose to become a Lottery Winner.

This is summed up nicely in a simple illustration from The Art of War for Writers by David Scott Bell. At the bottom are those who dream and dabble. Naturally, the size of each section decreases as you go up the author’s career ladder. At the “top” are those who have several published works beneath their belts. But these authors aren’t necessarily “Great” and in fact, they might not even be “Good” but regardless they made it to the “top.” Their reward is not an Automatic Bestseller as you might think. Instead, they get a chance on the wheel.

Illustration of the author's career path from James Scott Bell's The Art of War For Writers

The Wheel Of Fortune

Great Authors are not picked off the street, they are picked off the top half of the pyramid in David Scott Bell’s illustration. Every single story you complete, every novel you publish, is an entry in the Author’s Wheel of Fortune. Every published work gets put Out There for the public to judge. Every one of them has the opportunity to become the next Bestseller.

But most of them are destined for the Bargain Bin. Thanks for playing, but we have some lovely parting gifts for you.

Why is this Good News for Writers?

You might think this is all very pessimistic. Intellectual Poison spread to dissuade others from even trying. Actually, I think it’s liberating. Sure, you don’t get to choose whether you win, but you can choose if you want to play.

Your novel has a shot at bestseller status just like James Rollins does. Think about that. Once you realize that you really only control your author career to a certain point, then you can focus on what matters -building a body of solid works. Consistent. Quality. A Platform. A Reputation.

Tipping the Scales

Yes, there are those who want to figure out how the wheel works. They spend endless time, money and effort trying to cheat the system, but here is all you really need to know:

1. Keep Publishing.
2. Get Better.

The more you play, the better your odds. The better your entries, the better your odds. These two tips combined have an exponential effect on your odds of becoming a Great Author. If you have lots of entries, each better than the last… do the math. That’s better odds than spending time and money on a viral video campaign for a crappy knockoff of Twilight that hasn’t been professionally edited.

In Summation:

I guess I lied. There is one way that you can become a Great Author:

Write.

Tips To Make Any Event More Professional

It’s awesome that there’s enough of a community to pull together themed fashion shows here in Minneapolis and St. Paul.  So far we have Music, Vampire, Zombie, and now Steampunk fashion shows. Most of them are very well done and professional. Some are not.

One show in particular left me disappointed. Truth is, I’d hesitate to call it even semi-professional. And that’s a shame, because with just a tiny bit of consideration and a few keystrokes, it could have been on a par with professional events like Voltage: Fashion Amplified.

I see authors who make the same mistakes and come across as unprofessional with their book readings, signings and other public events. This article suggests simple ways to make any event look and feel more professional. It doesn’t pertain to authors only; any event can be made more professional by implementing these suggestions.

Sharing

One way authors act unprofessional and amateurish is when they are overly-protective of their work.  I once met a guy who said he was writing a book, but wouldn’t tell me what it was about. A person in my writer’s group marked on the rough draft he submitted for an editing critique that it was copyrighted. Seriously.

Events can exhibit the same unprofessional behavior on a larger scale. The steampunk fashion show I attended announced that absolutely no one was to take pictures, and anyone so much as exposing a camera would be roughed up. Meanwhile, there were hordes of “approved” people (Read: friends) running videocameras and snapping pix throughout the show.

Contrast that behavior with Voltage Fashion Amplified, a music/fashion show run by local fashion maven, Anna Lee. Cameras are encouraged. Anna knows that even crappy pix from your cellphone are free publicity. Every single person who takes pix of that event, posts the pix online, and reviews the event on their blogs are contributing to the promotion of the event. Why would you limit free publicity?

I suspect that people who are overprotective of their work are simply afraid that someone else will do it better. If that is your fear, then you shouldn’t release your work to the public. Ever. In any shape or form. Just keep in in your closet until you die, then someone else can get rich off it. (Or more likely, throw it away.)

Give First, Sell Second.

• Having something on hand to sell is nice, but not necessary.
• Having something on hand to give away is necessary.

Most people get this backwards, and treat their event like a Pampered Chef party. “Come to my book reading so you can buy my book!” does not entice anyone but your mother to show up. Tell people what’s in it for them, not what’s in it for you.  Free is the keyword. If your event doesn’t cost anything, say so. Prizes and giveaways are a good incentive. You don’t have to give away gold bricks or vials of unicorn tears. Bookmarks, posters or a drawing for a free (signed) copy of your book will work and they don’t cost much.

If you’re charging admission, you better have something pretty stellar to show. People want a lot for their money.

Recently, Prince held a concert and a “free” copy of his latest CD was included in the ticket price. We know better. The price of admission was raised to offset the cost of the CD and his album sales skyrocketed. Someone put a stop to that behavior, and good thing, because it wasn’t fair to those who already owned the CD. But nothing says authors can’t do something similar, like having the book available right at the door and offer a discount if purchased at the same time as the event cover.

Get a Quality MC

The Master of Ceremonies is the personification of your event – arguably as important than the talent. A hack MC can make even a good event look like its run by hacks. There’s more to being a good MC than just being comfortable in front of an audience, and it’s more than just filling empty space with witty banter.

An example of a great event MC is local hero Bobby Marsden, who runs the Fearless Filmmakers events. Bobby knows how to keep things moving along. He can direct a group of people on stage as easily as he can direct the attention of the audience, all while maintaining a sense of humor. Bobby Marsden knows how to control the event. And when he doesn’t, he knows how to maintain appearance of control over the event.  Things go wrong. The next act isn’t ready. The projector is broken. The microphone is cutting out. I’ve seen Bobby deal with all this in style, and most of the time, the audience doesn’t even realize something is wrong.

If the MC doesn’t have control, the audience will try to ‘help.’ NOTHING makes your show look like it was put on by a bunch of fanboyz than a bunch of fanboyz who hijack the show from an inept MC.

Be careful when your MC is also appearing in the show as an act. You might argue that the Oscars, Saturday Night Live and the Teen Choice Awards have announcers and presenters whom also take part in the show. The difference is that they are famous.  If you can get Lady Gaga to MC your show, then by all means have her on as a musical guest too. Having your cousin Tim act as MC is fine, but when he shows up later as a musical guest, it looks cheap.

Don’t Hide Your Event

It should be obvious, but if you want people to find your event, posting fliers all over town is optional. Posting the event info online is not. And I don’t mean  just the Date, Time and Place. People need to know if there is a cover charge, how long will the event last, and if there are age limitations. Most importantly, if the content of your event isn’t obvious from the title then you need to give a description of the event, ideally one that entices people to go.

It’s not good enough to list the event info on your blog. No one reads your blog. I know, because no one reads mine either. You need to put the info where people will go looking for it.

• Start with the venue website.
• Local media – Here in Minneapolis, the must-haves are vita.mn and city pages.com, but don’t overlook the MN Daily website, the Rake, Metromix.com and others.
• Specialty websites for your type of event. For example Dark Twin Cities.com loves to list local events with some dark flair. Jambase and Eventful list music events.
• If you didn’t think of social media like facebook, myspace and twitter, et al. then you should have someone else promote your events for you.
• Fine, go ahead and put it on your blog too. It’ll make you feel better.

You’re probably laughing right now. “Zero, have you been smoking grickle-grass with the Lorax? Everybody knows you have to list your events online!”

Um, actually, they don’t. When searching online for the steampunk fashion show, all I could find was an abstract event name which had more to do with porn stars than steampunk fashion. I ended up getting a tiny bit of info from one of the fashion designers for the show, and I totally took a chance even going. Most people would have given up. Actually, most people would never have found out in the first place. Perhaps the people holding the event didn’t want others to attend? Was it pseudo-members-only? That’s the feeling I got, which brings me to my next point.

Don’t Exclude your Audience

Add up the above suggestions and you’ll arrive at a larger truth about events. Be inclusive. Not exclusive. Cliques are for kids. No one’s going to have good things to say about your event if they feel snubbed. In fact, they’ll probably write a blog post just like this one.

If you’re a first-time visitor to Goth Prom, Renn Fest, Voltage: Fashion Amplified, the Zombie Pub Crawl, and other artistic events in the Minneapolis area, you’ll be welcomed, hit on, and have fake blood puked on you like everyone else. That’s the kind of experience that makes you want to not only come back again next year, but invite more people.

Planning

I shouldn’t have to say this, but have a schedule. Stick to it as close as you can, but be prepared to be flexible when things go wrong.

Team Up

OK, maybe you aren’t a big deal. Maybe the only crowd you can draw is your mother, and that’s because you live with her and will be driving her to the event yourself. If so, you might consider adding to the talent pool. A little cross-promotion can go a long way. Get your author friends involved and make a bigger event out of it. Get local vendors involved. God forbid if you can make the event big enough you might get some sponsors interested.

Summary

Is there anything wrong with a writer booking a venue and ignoring these thoughtful tips? Of course not. As long as they’re happy with just their friends showing up. In which case, they’d be money ahead to hold the event in their parents garage, then they can have full control of the event and keep all the money for themselves instead of splitting it with the venue.

But if you want to run a pro event that will grow over time, you have to include your audience. Make sure they know how fun and value-added your event is. Have a schedule and make sure your MC can manage the crowd in case things go wrong. Make your event findable online. These things separate the pros from a bunch of kids screwing around.

Did I miss anything? Any other event-behaviors that irk you or make the event less-than-professional? Share your thoughts in the comments below.

Or, How I learned to be Pessimistic about my Pessimism:

If for no other reason than sheer entertainment, you should flip open Martin Seligman’s Learned Optimism: How to Change Your Mind and Your Life to the pessimism test to see where you rate on the scale of Pessimistic Vs Optimistic. It’s a simple series of questions that you answer using more intuition than facts. The test rates you on several different aspects of optimism/pessimism. An overall score of ten is extremely optimistic, and a score of zero is extremely pessimistic.

I scored negative two.

My immediate thought was “That test sucks” which (if you think about it) confirms the accuracy of my score. Anyway, I’d always thought that my pessimism was a trait as predetermined as my eye color and not much could be done to change it. Until I read this book.

Unlike other psychologists who labored over making troubled people ‘normal,’ Martin Seligman researched how to make the normal life better, breaking himself away from the “Self Help” genre and into “Self Improvement.” In his studies, he uncovered the causes and effects of pessimism, as well as tools pessimists can use to break their own negative cycles and become less pessimistic. He calls this ability Learned Optimism.

Why In The Hell Should I Be Optimistic?

Lets be optimistic about pessimism for a moment. Why should I change my thinking habits? Maybe I like being a pessimist!

And being pessimistic about optimism for a moment, is too much optimism such a good thing? Dr Seligman did extensive research that proved optimists are less likely to see the world and the problems in it as accurately as pessimists do.

So why be more optimistic? The answer is: Depression.

Much of Learned Optimism details scientific studies done by Martin himself on behavior, optimism, pessimism, and their relation to depression. His years of research can’t be overlooked: Pessimists are less healthy, less likely to be chosen as leaders, and more prone to depression than optimists. Martin proposes that pessimism is the primary cause of depression.

Americans by and large don’t have a problem with pessimism. Wait, let me rephrase that. The depression rate and the suicide rate  in the United States have climbed significantly over the past decade, so Americans do have a problem with pessimism.  According to Dr Seligman, if you can change the way you think to become more optimistic, you can affect your health, your relationships and your career in a positive way.

Unlearning Pessimism

If you want the good stuff, flip to the last few chapters of Learned Optimism, where Martin Seligman sums up the results of a decade of research. His findings suggest that the way you explain the world to yourself, and the amount of time you spend ruminating on events has a large bearing on your optimism. Lucky for you, Learned Optimism has tips and tactics on how to undo your internal programming and overcome these limiting behaviors.

Does it work? Will it blend? Maybe if you’re optomistic. I wish I were kidding.

Some might recall the fad of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (made popular in the 90′s by Tony Robbins and others) and how “affirmations” and methods of talking to yourself would change your life. I hope everyone knows that saying “I have an Invisible Flying Pony” over and over with conviction will not make it true. I doubt saying “Every Day, In Every Way, I’m Getting Better And Better” will work either.

Then again, on the pessimist test I scored negative two on a scale of zero to ten.

-Zero

“The Universe is made of stories, not atoms.”

- Muriel Rukeyser

Stop me if you’ve heard this one…

There’s been a lot of buzz on the web about piracy, this time not affiliated with the Flying Spaghetti Monster or Johnny Depp, but… e-books.

Every news article about the potential e-book market is another can of gas on the fire:

• The petition against Google’s e-book scanning
• Apple’s impending i-book store
• The Kindle-killing (and horrifically named) i-Pad

Seems that e-books are the talk of internetville. But doesn’t all this talk sound familiar? Stop me if you’ve heard this one:

Sales are down! Piracy is destroying the industry! Lawsuits! Copyright!! DRM!!!

Oh yes, that’s right. We DID hear all this before. From the music industry. We heard it when the cassette tape format was invented. We heard it again when CD burners became a household item. And we got to hear it again when Napster + broadband internet connections made it possible to download an entire library of audio in minutes. And now that books are on the block, we get to hear it again from the publishing industry.

Yawn.

I’ll direct the publishing industry to read my Open Letter to Gene Simmons (of the band KISS) and the RIAA. Simply replace the word “music” with “e-book” and replace “Recording Industry” with “Publishing Industry”.

Oh, and replace “Pirates” with “Pirates”.

The Problem is Virtual

Until recently, artistic works such as music, video, pictures and stories required a medium to contain the art and transfer it from one person to another. That medium (Tape, DVD, CD, Book, etc…) had a production cost, a fixed physical expense that someone had to pay because that THING had to be manufactured, packaged, shipped, received, warehoused, and stocked.

For decades, we’ve been told how much it costs to make THINGS and to ship THINGS and to stock THINGS. And the cost of the THINGS keeps going up because of [fill in the blank].

But consumers were never buying the THING. People don’t really want a cassette tape. Or a book. Or a computer file for that matter. Consumers want the art that the medium carries. They want the story about Frodo and Sam. They want the song by Jagged Spiral. They want the picture of the pirate flag.

With the internet, the medium is all but removed from the product, leaving an intangible stream of ones and zeros. At long last, the products of art have been un-THING-ified. Virtualized.

One of the reasons consumers never wanted the medium in the first place was that it adds unnecessary cost to the art. Well, now the medium is almost completely gone, but where are the savings? We should be seeing prices dive for the virtual products, but the industries still try to justify the old prices.

This is a problem.

Price Check

Why is an e-book selling for $9 when the hardcover book is $13? Why in the Hells do they both list at $29?

Seriously. Twenty Nine American Dollars is the Publisher’s Suggested Retail Price for an E-Book? Is that supposed to make you think that $9 is a good deal?

I’m not the only one calling the publishing industry out on it’s bullshit. New York Times Bestselling Author Michael Stackpole lists plenty of other reasons publishers can’t justify their e-book pricing.

The industry holds the price up, because they won’t let go of the THING-ness of their product. They see every sale of a virtual product as a direct equivalent of the sale of a physical product. They think that every e-book sold is a physical book not sold.

Reality Check: Virtual products are not Physical products.

Truth is, the publishing industry should be thrilled to death about internet distribution. E-books may have a lower cost, but they have a far higher margin than their physical counterparts. If you don’t know what that means, ask an accountant. If you can’t make your business work with this new math, then hire a fucking accountant, and change your business to become profitable. The last thing you’d want to do is waste money on lawyers to fight the system. Ask the recording industry.

Why is the industry is down? Why aren’t people buying? Its simple. The product is virtualized, but the price is not.

Hey, it’s a free market, and it’s not against the law for businesses or even the entire industry to use business practices leading to their own obsolescence. It also isn’t against the law for them to starve to death because they refuse to adapt to the new technology.

But it looks like instead of taking advantage of the new technology they have available, the publishing industry has decided to try to force a square peg into a round hole. When that doesn’t work, they sulk and stare at the dwindling sales and blame…

Pirates!

Before you break out the flamethrowers, understand that I’m not endorsing piracy.  Piracy is unlawful and unethical. Google is evil for doing it, and so is everyone else who does it.

But I am telling you that it is entirely true that (music/movie/ebook) piracy is NOT “killing” the (recording/motion-picture/publishing)  industry. It wasn’t back when cassette tapes came out. It wasn’t back when the VCR was released to consumers. Author’s careers are not being destroyed because their books are available for free at the library, or borrowed from friends, or sold in used bookstores. Musicians aren’t going broke because their songs are played on terrestrial radio, myspace, and pandora at no cost to consumers.

The publishing industry is down because of many factors, but piracy is the last one to worry about. Wasting time on it is like rearranging deck chairs on a sinking ship.  Keelhauling every pirate in the universe won’t fix what’s wrong with the publishing industry, the music industry, or any other industry, because Pirates are not a problem; they are a symptom.

Let’s look at the problem that causes piracy to become popular:

Free as in “E-Books”

Price a product high enough and two things will happen.

• Sales of that product will decrease.
• Customers will find other ways to get the product for less.

The music industry already learned this, but let’s look at how it pertains to the publishing industry, by examining these ‘other ways’ to get the product for less than the listed price:

• You can get every Dean Koontz book ever written for free… at the public library.
• You can get every Stephanie Meyer book for free… by borrowing them from your niece.
• You can buy the latest Stephen King novel for One Dollar…  on Craigslist. (In hardcover.)
• You can buy Scott Sigler’s latest for just a couple bucks… at the used bookstore.
• Ebay.com
• Swaptree.com
• Bookcrossing.com
• And you can get the latest of pretty much any e-book for free… by pirating it via bittorrent.

Care to wager that library usage is way up? Borrowing/lending? But you won’t hear about the publishing industry claiming that libraries are “Destroying the industry” or trying pass laws banning the sharing of books. That would be just as laughable as saying that pirates are destroying the industry.  It’s just one more way customers can get the product if they don’t think it’s worth the list price.

Am I suggesting that publishers are causing an increase in piracy by setting their prices too high? Yes. Just like they are “causing” people to check books out at the library, or borrowing them instead of purchasing them at the bookstore. Just like they are causing consumers to obtain the product through other methods, or pass on the product altogether.

Of course publishers have to fight piracy, or people will think they’re OK with it. But to declare that piracy is destroying the publishing industry is simply not true. Illegal? Yes. On the rise? No doubt. But look at the cause:

Your business plan sucks.

Here’s where you should be focusing. Not on pirates. Solve this problem, and piracy will diminish, along with borrowing/lending and library usage.

But, we doesn’t understand business or teh Interwebs!

I can already hear the publishing industry screaming at me that it can’t make a profit off what people are willing to pay for e-books. Sorry, but that argument does not fly.

You can price your product whereever you like, but products are never worth more than people are willing to pay for them. It doesn’t matter how much they cost to make.  Like I said, price it too high and people won’t buy it or they will find cheaper alternatives. Yes, including piracy.

This is the spot where I’d make a “buggy whip manufacturer” reference, but q.e.d. right?

The Solution

The solution starts by acknowledging the real problem.

The solution starts with letting go of the paradigm of treating ones and zeros on the web as a physical product. Virtual products are not Physical products.

The solution starts when people stop crying that change is bad, fighting against the new tech, and trying to cover up bad business models by blaming pirates.

I suspect the solution requires a generation of post-internet people growing up with virtualized products; people who weren’t born into a system of 100% THINGS and then had to suffer the paradigm shift to the virtual. These people will have a more intimate understanding of this “problem”, and perhaps when they grow up to take over for the current regime, they will arrive at a more elegant solution – one that works to Everyone’s advantage.

A Review of Playing Evil in the Video Game “Neverwinter Nights 2″

[Editor's Note: There's a handful of micro-spoilers in here, but nothing that will keep you from enjoying the game.]

I’ve waxed philosophic before about breaking out of my assassin RPG niche. In the video game Oblivion, I played a  hyper-testostrinated human male fighter carrying the largest and longest weapon I could lift. In Jade Empire, I chose a female magic user. Throughout the Original Neverwinter Nights Trilogy (Neverwinter Nights / Shadows of Undrentide / Hordes of the Underdark) my avatar was a tricksy, elvish Shadowdancer.

Neverwinter Nights 2 (NWN2 for short) gave me a new option for avatar diversity.

It was 30 Dec 2007. The game installer chugged away as I read the back of the game box for the upteenth time. Bright letters across the box declared, “Everything you do has a meaning”. Other games have offered options for playing evil characters, but NWN2 seemed to go a step further, almost daring players to test the boundaries of morality. After all, the game designers had taken the time to plot out the repercussions of all your actions in the game. My Inner Philosopher pitched a denim pup-tent as he thought about turning the reins over to my Inner Evil Draconian Overlord.

Evil it is then. For while I’d played a diverse series of characters in the past, I’d always been on the Good side. The obviously-we-have-to-kill-the-shadowlord-because-he-wears-black-and-has-a-deep-voice side. What if I wanted to kill the shadowlord just so I could take his place? What would it be like to be the new evil on the block?

Pyro Firespawn and Posse. Yeah, We Bad

I decided to find out.

And so Pyro Firespawn was born. Don’t laugh. He’s a Chaotic Evil Tiefling. Tieflings are humans tainted with blood of a demonic heritage.  He’s got horns and a tail. He likes to burn things. He’s also a cleric, so he can kill people, raise them from the dead, and then kill them again. (That’s why I told you not to laugh.)

Xtna helped with the aesthetic creation of Pyro. He’s my first avatar to have any resemblance to my physical self. At least, as near as the game engine would allow us to create. Do you want to date my avatar?

The Difficulty of Evil

So I set out on my Evil Epic Adventure. It wasn’t as simple as it sounds. Right away, I discovered difficulties being evil. If I simply slay everyone who got between myself and what I wanted (merchants, for example) I’d have no one to back me up and the game would end with me in prison. That wouldn’t be a long game, and it wouldn’t be a satisfactory ending.

Evil Lesson #1 – Evil requires Power and/or Stealth. Pretty much all the sins require you to be stronger, faster or sneakier than someone else. When you’re a Level One Pissboy, you ain’t pushing anyone around. Therefore, I shied away from being what I called Stupid Evil. I had to keep my eyes on the big prize. Intelligent Evil is far more evil, don’t you think?

Evil Lesson #2 – Evil Looks Good. I often found myself weighing off which side of the fight would help me more in my evil goals. Should I be nice to this person because they might join my party or give me information? Should I kill the dragon and save the townsfolk, if that is the only way to get them to tell me where the uber-important evil magic sword could be found? Signs point to yes.

Evil Lesson #3 “The Enemy Of My Enemy Is My Friend” One thing was always certain. I was literally hell-bent on defeating the King of Shadows, because he was coming to destroy everything.  In fact, some of my companions were happy to stand alongside me in battle although they did not agree with my alignment for the same reason – because the Enemy of My Enemy is My Friend.

I was so Good at Looking Good and being Evil, I could have run for the Republican Party.

Evil Lesson #4 – Evil Loves Company. Did Hitler have any friends? Probably more like “associates” or “companions”, which were another aspect to consider in NWN2. They have alignments too, and if I upset their more…delicate sensibilities, they could leave or worse, turn on me at a crucial moment. There’s no pleasing everyone, and some of my companions did leave me because of my choices. Others flat-out defected to the other team. (…and died some pretty spectacular deaths because of it. Seems their actions had repercussions too.) So, in order to keep the allegiance of my followers, I had to avoid certain evil tasks that I wanted to do. In order to increase their loyalty, I had to help them perform some good tasks I didn’t really want to do. Basically picking my battles and weighing off short term Goodness for Long-Term, Big-Picture Evil.

Halfway through the game, I had my evil system perfected. I was truly evil in (seemingly) unimportant interactions and lied and backstabbed when appropriate to further my larger objectives. On the surface I was just a Regular Guy who looked like he was following the rules. In this respect, I became less Chaotic Evil and more Lawful Evil. I was so Good at Looking Good and Being Evil, I could have run for the Republican Party.

Or so I thought.

Fate and/or the game designers were a step ahead here, because it wasn’t long before I was placed on trial for a crime I did not commit. I thought I had little to worry about… until they began to call in Character Witnesses.

Let’s put it this way – it was a long trial.

That aside, my philosophy of Evil-When-It-Matters worked well. I gained a lot of trust and respect with my companions, the Thieves Guild, and with good King Nasher himself. Eventually I was granted my own keep and knighted. I had a party of very powerful followers, some of whom could beat Mother Teresa on the Goodness Meter.

Then the time came, and I took my party of followers deep into the enemy’s domain to confront the Shadow-Lord himself.

Denouement – Evil is Good

Sunday November 15, 2009 I reached the ending of Neverwinter Nights 2. The inner sanctum of the Shadow Lord’s stronghold. Because of my evil affiliation, I was offered the opportunity to leave my companions and join with the Shadow Lord.  I saved the game and played out both possible endings. [Note: You might get the same opportunity for the alternate ending if you play a good character, but since I didn't do this, I can't be sure.]

I have to say, the evil ending was easier and more satisfying, but it was more because of the way the actual endings were written – something which has raised concern with more than one person who played through NWN2. If you’re interested in reading more about the NWN2 endings, check out this review by aeon (warning: spoilers) which does a good job of summing up the disappointing ending for good characters.

Was it Fun Being Evil?

It was certainly a lot more work. Often, I had to try and guess what the game designers meant to be Evil choices in the game. The ambiguous wording of my question-response options made me think, “Is that an evil thing to say?” The Good responses were mostly obvious, so it probably would have been easier to play a Good character.

Some of the evilness was fun. Double-crossing a dragon? Wow. Fun and rewarding. Happily throwing out promises you have no intention to keep was more of a relief than actual ‘fun’. Killing people who thought they could trust you, that was a tough one.

In short, being evil towards evil beings was wicked fun. Being evil towards good people wasn’t easy. Being evil towards helpless people brought me no joy at all.

Beyond Evil

With NWN2 behind me, I’m just in time for the next big thing… Dragon Age: Origins. Apparently, they’ve tried even harder to blur the line between good and evil.

Dragon Age: Origins is on my Christmas list. So expect a review when I finish it…two years from now…

-Z

In part one of this series on Audience Entitlement, we discovered that the author does not work for the audience.

In part two, I pointed out that the audience doesn’t have to take any crap from the author. (That’s what I’m here for. My amazing perception of the obvious.)

Now, let’s put these two parts together and find out, Will It Blend?

The Golden Rule

I listed “Honesty” and “Respect” as two things the audience can reasonably expect from an author. These are fluffy terms, and difficult to measure. In some cases, only the author knows if they are being honest or not. And there’s always some sum-bich who has to push the envelope. Who’s to say that intentionally leaving the third book out of a series couldn’t be Honestly and Respectfully done, if that’s the artist’s intention?

Plenty of gray area for us to all fight over, but the concept boils down to this:

Regarding the Audience/Author relationship, the best rule of thumb is The Golden Rule, which works in both directions. The author should respect the audience, and the audience should respect the author.

The Solution to Incomplete Series Malaise

Taking this discussion back to the original post by Neil Gaiman, the issue of audience entitlement was brought up regarding the phenomenon I titled “Incomplete Series Malaise”.

The problem summarized, is that the audience wants the next book in the series but the author isn’t working on it, or isn’t working on it as quickly as members of the audience would like.

For the author to simply say “I’m not your bitch” and leave it at that is disrespectful. The audience will say, “I’m not your bitch either,” and then see how many curses about you they can fit into a 140-character twitter post. Sadly this is where Mr. Gaiman left the matter hang, when I believe he is only half right.  I say that because the  solution to Incomplete Series Malaise comes in two parts:

If the audience respects the author, they won’t make demands.

When a member of the audience begins reading a series, they should not have any expectation of due dates or even of completion, except for what the author communicates. The audience can be as excited and enthusiastic as they want, and while they have every right to ask when the next book will be done, they have NO RIGHT to demand the next book in a series, or to get pissed off if it isn’t getting done when they’d like.

Audiences, if you can’t handle this, then don’t read a series until it’s complete. The author is not your bitch.

If the author respects his/her audience, he/she will tell them when the next book in the series is expected to be finished.

This is the part that I think Mr. Gaiman missed. True, the author does not work for the audience, but an author who does not at least have some respect for thieir audience doesn’t deserve one.

The wise author would have information about book release dates at a webpage/FAQ/blog post where excited fans can be directed. This is the official “I know, I got it, I already answered that, and you can find the official answer here…”

Authors, if you can’t handle this, then don’t write a series. Its disrespectful to the audience, and they are not your bitch.

And So On…

We can extend this simple solution out to ten-thousand other areas of the author/audience relationship. For example, social media responsiveness, web presence, the author’s right to privacy…

When I boil the whole thing down like this, it seems like the “Can’t we all just get along?” solution. And it is. You’d think we wouldn’t need this bit of common sense pointed out to us, but all it takes is one dickhead with a twitter account or an introverted author [Editor's Note: Aren't they all?] to ruin it for the rest of us.

So, when the inevitable happens, and you see authors/audiences getting into a pissing match, feel free to link them here for a dose of common sense.* And if you have any other applications for this bit of wisdom, feel free to leave a comment…

-Zero

*Except for me, naturally. Point me back to this post and I will totally fuck you up.