Review Disclaimer

A few disclaimers about this review before I get started:

• I know Joel Arnold personally. He is a fellow member of the Minnesota Speculative Fiction Writer’s Group.
• I purchased Northwoods Deep from Joel directly.
• I do not owe Joel money from an old gambling debt involving Jagermeister, a Trampoline and a Super-Soaker. No matter what he says.
• I was not compensated for this review. (But I do get some love if you follow my links to Amazon, which helps offset my webhosting fees and various addictions which may involve Jagermeister, Trampolines, and Super-Soakers…)

File Under Horror

With that out of the way, I can tell you it’s been a while since I’ve read real Horror like this. It was refreshing to read something that was not chilling, dark, or edgy, but actually horrifying.

If Twilight read Northwoods Deep, it would die of fright.

Cabin-in-the-woods stories seem to have faded in popularity over the years. Even Jason Voorhees eventually left his cabin and traveled to outer space. But that doesn’t mean there isn’t plenty of room here to play. Joss Whedon’s The Cabin In The Woods is one example. Joel Arnold’s Northwoods Deep is another.

Carol and Brenda Gunderson embark on a canoe trip on the Mesaba River. When their canoe capsizes, they discover a cabin in the woods occupied by an old man hiding a terrible secret. Based on a mix of Native American folklore and the Grimm Brother’s Hansel & Gretel, Northwoods Deep will take you on a wild ride over the river and through the woods, straight into terror. http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/11805438-northwoods-deep?ac=1

The cover shows a close-up of a cabin window, and inside is a pile of human skulls that must be at least waist-deep. Far from just symbolic, it is actually pretty close to the truth. Consider it accurate foreshadowing. Rustic setting. Cabin in the woods. Lots of bones…

Northwoods Deep is an all-you-can-read buffet of horror: Bugs, dead bodies, spousal abuse, murder, rape, bestiality, torture, bondage, stalking, alcoholism, ghosts, nightmares, dark family secrets, and my personal least-favorite, the claustrophobic feeling of being buried alive…

But the underlying supernatural horror is the cherry on top of the horror sundae called Northwoods Deep. I won’t give too much away by saying that if you aren’t digging the start of the book, hang in there. Like Stephen King’s writings, Northwoods Deep slides slowly from a real-world scenario into a supernatural horror-fest.

Joel’s writing is clean and crisp. He delivers just the right level of detail. He knows how much to show, and just as importantly, what to leave out. This is crucial for good horror stories. The author has to leave enough space for your mind to fill in the blanks, and this is done well in Northwoods Deep.

Pacing is smooth for the most part. Joel doesn’t let you rest for long before unleashing some new horror on you, or showing you things from a different and more horrifying perspective. As you would expect, the ending of the book becomes a page-turner as the plotlines come together to climax. The epilogue gives one of the characters a disturbing resolution, but otherwise, there was no ante-climax.  I would have liked to see how the surviving characters had changed (or not) after their ordeal. Perhaps in the sequel…?

Joel’s description is very good, especially when describing locations. I’m extremely familiar with cabins, camping, and canoeing in Northern Minnesota where most of Northwoods Deep takes place. So I can vouch that Joel paints an accurate picture of the setting. He brings out elements of the area that most people would take for granted. I know the setting will be interesting for those who’ve never left the city.

Characters are good, although I wish the protagonist Carol was tougher. She puts up a half-hearted front and makes a couple brave decisions, but in the end I felt she was a weak hero, constantly fretting and relying too much on others to bail her out of trouble. Then again, I generally enjoy reading about Kick Ass Heroines, so others might find the character more real and easy to relate with.

The evil in Northwoods Deep is scattered at first. In fact, the number of antagonists might exceed the number of protagonists. I lost count. But the danger ratchets up well through the story and consolidates via some clever plot twists.

There are many character points-of-view (POVs) in this story.  The POV shifted around more often than I prefer, but we get LOTS of insight into the mind of the antagonists, and those sections I thought were the most terrifying of all.

Northwoods Deep – Executive Summary Review

Northwoods Deep by Joel Arnold combines Native American folklore with Hansel and Gretel, and applies layers of both physical and psychological horrors from many different perspectives.

The story follows Carol Gunderson as she joins her sister on a canoe trip in Northern Minnesota. Carol just wants to unwind and forget about her abusive, stalking, ex-husband. But a powerful and ancient evil in a secluded cabin has other plans, and Carol’s trip descends into supernatural terror.

Despite containing scenes of torture, rape, and bestiality, the writing cleverly manages to avoid being graphic. There is plenty of space for your own mind to fill in the gory details. This story is definitely not for the immature or squeamish.

No matter what pushes your panic button, I guarantee there is something in Northwoods Deep to frighten you.

• Northwoods Deep on Amazon (affiliate link – thanks for your support!)
• Joel Arnold’s Amazon Author Page
• Joel Arnold on Google Plus
• Joel Arnold on Goodreads
• Joel Arnold on Facebook

Since 2003 I’ve been writing blog-reviews here about dark and beautiful things. I’ve used the category Ubercool to reference arts, artists, events and things that I think are glorious. And I never once worried that anyone would read them.

But now, my site traffic and ranking have increased to astonishing levels. My inbox is filled with requests for reviews and offers for paid advertising. You read that right. Paid. Advertising.

“You should have an award. You know, like a seal of approval!”

Ten years ago, I felt like the weird kid sitting by himself and reading Lovecraft while listening to Marilyn Manson. Now I feel like some kind of Dark Fiction Authority. The Goth Guru? The Hipster of Darkness?

But an award would be pretty cool. And easy. Or so I thought. It had to be generic enough to encompass all kinds of arts, artists and events…

…and I wanted the word “dark” in there someplace…

…and it had to be clear that it was something positive…

…and I didn’t want it to sound hokey…

…or make me sound like a minion of Satan herself. (A common misconception, btw. We just hung out in the same circles in college…)

Anyway, I’m proud to finally present my “Shadow of Approval” for arts and artistry that embrace the dark side. Mega-thanks to my graphic-savvy friend, J. Stuart Johnson for taking my conceptual-hack-job and turning it into an amazingly cool graphic. In fact, he should be the first artist I give the award to. If you need graphics or website work done, you should hire him.

What Are “Arts of Darkness”?

read more »

Cool. Bitchin. Gnarly. Classic. Mint. Def. Sweet. Excellent.

Awesome has been around for a long time now. Maybe too long. It’s time for a new adjective. And that adjective is…

Glorious

I’ll be using “Glorious” henceforth as my generic affirmative adjective and exclamation of choice. I hope you’ll do the same. Why? Because it would be Glorious, that’s why.

PS: Def? Really? Did you ever hear anyone actually say “Def”? Regardless, there was a funeral for “Def” in 1993, so Def is officially dead and should never be used in polite conversation.

Writing isn’t generally the most “earth-friendly” occupation, I swear I’ve printed out an entire deciduous forest in rough draft manuscript hard copies just so I could burn them. (Trust me, it’s a whole different feeling than right-click-and-delete.)

Anyway, to work off some of my karmic debt and to help celebrate EarthWeek, here is a great service I just heard about called Yerdle. Yerdle’s slogan is “Why shop when you can share?”

What is yerdle? 
Yerdle is the new mission-driven California Benefit corporation that’s out to help people share with their friends rather than buying things new. On yerdle, friends post items they’re willing to give away or loan, search for items they’re looking to get, and nab the things they want. Simple.

You must have a Facebook account to access Yerdle. Once logged in, you can give/receive things for free. Kinda like craigslist.com without the cash, or backpage.com without the sex. The founders of Yerdle hope that if people give away things they don’t want, this will help keep stuff out of the landfill. Everyone wins. Especially the Earth, and excepting manufacturers, of course.

I signed into Yerdle and the interface is clean and simple. It doesn’t need any kind of user’s manual. You can list something, or ‘ask around’ for something. I didn’t give/receive anything myself, so I’m not clear how these “free” goods get transported from location A to location B without some cost of time/energy, but if someone wants your old skis, then coming over to pick them up is still cheaper than buying them.

There’s also the potential for abuse, (in other words, people getting free things through Yerdle then “flipping” them to ebay/craigslist) so when this happens, you Do Not get to be surprised, because I told you so. Since the service routes through Facebook, your “friendship” through facebook acts as a filter of sorts which should help minimize abuse. But even if others are going to flip your stuff, if you were too lazy to list them on Craigslist yourself, you’ll feel better about giving them away than throwing them in the trash. And so will the Earth.

Drawing For Free Earth-Friendly Swag!

NBCUniversal’s Share and Tell has graciously offered a Green is Universal Prize Pack which includes an earth-friendly canvas tote bag full of earth-friendly swag stuff for me to give away to one lucky fan of conradzero.com!

There are three ways to win:

1. Members of the Cult of Zero are automatically entered in the drawing. Membership is free, sign up at the Cult of Zero.
2. Anyone who shares a link to this blog post on the social media of their choice will be entered in the drawing. Email me to verify your entry – zero at conradzero.com.
3. Anyone who takes the ECO Quiz “How Green Are You?” and posts their results in the comments section will be eligible to win.

Anyone who does all three options will have three chances to win!

Contest ends 8AM this Friday, May 3. Winner chosen at random, contacted by email and must respond within 48 hours or another winner will be selected. Prize can only be delivered to locations accessible by FedEx/UPS. No PO boxes, sorry!

NBC’s Share And Tell App

Learn more about Yerdle and take the ECO Quiz “How Green Are You?” through the app below. Remember to post your score in the comments section by this Friday to be entered in the drawing!

Yours Darkly,

-Conrad Zero

 

If anyone ever asked me how I got started writing, I’d tell them, “Well, I had this idea for a story, and I decided to write it.” That first part is easy. The second part, not so much. Lots of people have great ideas, but they don’t decide to…you know, like Nike says – Just Do It.

Adam Shepard…

…has great ideas. For example:

“I am going to start – almost literally from scratch – with one 8′ x 10′ tarp, a sleeping bag, an empty gym bag, $25, and the clothes on my back. Via train, I will be dropped at a random place somewhere in the southeastern United States that is not in my home state of North Carolina. I have 365 days to become free of the realities of homelessness and become a “regular” member of society.”

-http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scratch_Beginnings

Not only is this an interesting idea, Adam actually decided to do it. He followed through, achieved his goal, and learned much along the way, which he documented in a book called Scratch Beginnings. The book was a huge success, gaining him critical acclaim.

In 2009 Alan had another great idea. To save up for two years, then travel around the world for an entire year.

Once again, he didn’t just have a great idea, he decided to follow through. Alan visited 17 countries on 4 continents between 2011 and 2012. He documented his experience in a book called One Year Lived.

One Year Lived…

…is a stream-of-consciousness, nearly-fictional, but very Real account of Adam Shepard’s year spent travelling the planet.  Watching sunsets. Getting robbed. Fighting bulls. Bungee-jumping off a bridge. Meeting people, but most importantly, Living.

He details his travels with clear and witty prose. The tone is casual and friendly, as if he were telling you the story while you were sitting next to him on a beach sipping a Mojito. Needless to say, One Year Lived is a quick and easy read.

Lots of people have the great idea to go travelling. You know…. study abroad, hitch-hike across Europe, stay at youth hostels… the combination of adventure and hazing ritual that is endlessly romanticized (mostly by parents of college-age kids who wish they’d actually done it themselves.)

Lots of people talk of this great idea to travel and “find themselves.” But Adam actually decided to do it. He says his goal wasn’t to find himself, and he wasn’t unhappy with his life. Alan believes in travel as a means of enrichment and personal growth:

“People need to travel more, not only because it is satisfying and fun and inspires purpose and provides service to a world that needs it and sparks creativity, but because we need to open up our eyes to what is really going on out there…

There’s only so much you can learn in the classroom. Sometimes you have to get out there to experience it, to touch it, to feel it, to see it for yourself…”

Writers need experience to draw from, and there’s no replacement for first-hand experiences like these:

• Riding an elephant in Thailand
• Experiencing a sunrise from a mountaintop in Guatemala
• Hugging a koala in Australia
• Bungee jumping off a bridge in Slovakia
• Fighting a bull in Nicaragua.

Alan does all of this and much more, and you can read all about it in One Year Lived. Alan’s hope is that after reading One Year Lived, you’ll be motivated to get out there and expand your culture, enrich your sense of diversity, find yourself.

In fact, Alan wants this enough that he’s willing to give his book to you for free:

Get A Free E-Book Of One Year Lived!

Adam Shepard has graciously offered to give away free copies of the e-book version of One Year Lived to fans of conradzero.com. Here’s how it works:

1. Share this blog post review of One Year Lived by Alan Shepard on the social media of your choice (blog, google+,  facebook, twitter, etc…) 
2. Email me that you did – zero at conradzero dot com

That’s it. You share a link to this post, let me know, and I’ll reply email you instructions on how to download One Year Lived in one of several different e-book formats. Cut/paste the link or look for the buttons at the top and bottom of this post to help you share to most popular social media sites.

Obviously, Alan can’t give copies of his book away forever, or he’ll never sell any! So at the risk of sounding like an infomercial, I’ll warn you that this is a limited time offer. Get your shares in by Noon on  Sunday, April 21st.  After that, we have to pull the plug.

Get A Free Signed Paperback Of One Year Lived!

Everyone who helps share this blog post is also entered in a drawing for the physical book, signed by Adam Shepard himself. I’ll pick a winner at random and notify by email. The paperbook version of One Year Lived will be released on Monday, April 22nd.

I hope you enjoy One Year Lived. I know it will inspire you with grand ideas. But remember, that’s the easy part.

The hard part is deciding to just do it.

• One Year Lived Website
• One Year Lived on Amazon (affiliate link)

Yours Darkly,

Conrad Zero

William Alexander was initially referred to me for a panel on ‘Writing Successful Query Letters.’ I was coordinating the panel for a Minnesota Speculative Fiction Writers Group meetup. A bit of online snooping revealed that William’s debut novel, Goblin Secrets had won the 2012 National Book Award for Young People’s Literature.  Anyone whose first novel wins a National Book Award must have some success with query letters. So I asked William to be on the panel, and he was kind enough to share his query letter experiences with the writer’s group.

When William announced he was doing a reading/signing party for Goblin Secrets, (along with fellow MNSpec author Kelly Barnhill) I dashed out to pick up a signed copy of his award-winning book. It was a quick read. In two sittings, I breezed through a great YA tale filled with fresh, clean prose, and a simple, but effective plot.

Goblin Secrets is a great fantasy/steampunk/adventure for young adults, and an amazing debut novel by William Alexander.

Goblin Secrets of Zombay, MN

Goblin Secrets takes place in a town called Zombay, which has a northside and a southside and a river between them. The descriptions of the northside and southside of Zombay reminded me of Minneapolis and St. Paul, which Minnesota locals call the “Twin Cities.”

In Zombay, acting and wearing masks is outlawed. Only goblins can wear masks and act on stage. (In Minnesota, we have the Zombie Pub Crawl, where everyone is encouraged to put on masks and act. Or at least dance. Those who can’t act or dance are encouraged to drink until they think they can act or dance.)

The world of Goblin Secrets is different enough from our own world to make it interesting, yet it feels familiar. This New-But-Familiar feeling is the magic formula I’m told publishers (and audiences) drool over. Goblin Secrets has this formula in spades.

The story is part fairy tale, part young-adult-fantasy, part magical realism, and a dash of steampunk. Goblin Secrets goes light on the darkness. It isn’t as dark as the average Grimm’s Fairy Tale. It’s a good read for the younger of the YA market. The book website suggests ages 8-12.

The main character is a boy named Rownie, who runs errands (partially willingly) for an evil witch named Graba. Graba reminded me of the tales of Baba Yaga and her movable hut. Except Graba has mechanical, clockwork-chicken-legs.  Rownie’s brother has gone missing, and everyone is looking for him. Rownie’s fascination with a troupe of goblin actors leads him on an adventure with magical masks, witch’s curses, chases, exploration, near misses and threats that “the Flood is Coming.” I had to laugh because it reminded me of the quote “Winter Is Coming” from the Game of Thrones.

There are areas of the story that could have used more depth. I would have liked to know more about the creatures which haunt the underground railcar tunnels, and the “changing”, and the mask magic. But none of these issues affected my enjoyment of the story, it only made me hopeful that there are more books coming to give more depth to Zombay.

Executive Summary Review of Goblin Secrets

Goblin Secrets is a great fantasy/steampunk/adventure for young adults, and an amazing debut novel by William Alexander. The pacing is smooth and smart. A new and interesting world reveals at a snappy pace. Goblin Secrets is a quick and enjoyable read that will leave you wanting more.

• Goblin Secrets Book Website
• Goblin Secrets on Amazon (Afilliate Link)
• William Alexander – Official Website
• William Alexander – Goodreads
• William Alexander – Facebook

Someone sold their soul to the Gods of Hipster-Pop-Culture-Soft-Porn to get this movie made.

I’ll be honest, even if  former-teen-pop-princesses Tiffany and Debbie Gibson weren’t in this movie, I still woulda watched it. Because there’s three things you know for sure about a movie named Mega Python Vs Gatorord:

1. There’s gonna be a Mega Python in it.
2. There’s gonna be a Gatoroid in it. 
3. They’re gonna rumble.

I know, it sells itself, right?

But it gets even better. Like an infomercial, this movie just keeps adding on reasons you should see it. Serious monster movies like The Thing, Aliens, Cloverfield, and others are great fun in their own right. But movies like Mega Python Vs Gatoroid emphasize the campy, kitchiness of later Godzilla films, which makes such a preposterous movie recipe, I’ll bet even those who don’t like horror films could enjoy it.

For example, when Tiffany feeds experimental steroids to Everglades Gators and says, “This isn’t crazy right? I mean what could possibly go wrong…?” When three people search the Florida Everglades on foot, and actually find the person they are looking for…. When a block-long Mega Python bites into a blimp, which deflates like a balloon, spinning off into the sky trailing the hapless reptile PHBBBBBbbbbb…..

I know, you should probably just stop reading this review now and jump on Netflix, right?

But Wait! There’s More!! Because there’s three things you know for sure about a movie with Tiffany AND Debbie Gibson in it:

1. Tiffany’s gonna be in it.
2. Debbie Gibson’s gonna be in it.
3. They’re gonna rumble.

This film releases almost a quarter-century of tension when Tiffany and Debbie Gibson get in a catfight which becomes a foodfight, which becomes a whipped-cream-smearing contest which somehow becomes a water-fight when they land in a pond that was not remotely close by…  Whew! The only thing missing was a brass pole for them to spin on as they fought.

Someone sold their soul to the Gods of Hipster-Pop-Culture-Soft-Porn to get this movie made.

Makes you wonder why there’s a hunger problem, because there’s enough cheese in this film to supply the entire earth’s population for at least a month. Plot holes bigger than the largest gatoroid. Leaps of faith longer than any mega python.

Oh yeah, and a special guest appearance by Mickey Dolenz of the Monkeys. Q.E.D. already. You had me at “Debbie Gibson smears whipped cream across Tiffany’s cleavage.” Twenty years ago, I would’ve dropped cash to see that…

Wait a minute. What am I saying? I’d still drop cash to see that. Now if only Torid or Vivid Entertainment could step in…well, maybe some fantasies are best left unresolved.

Someone needs to put a name on this genre of film. I hope The Asylum has a whole Mega Python Vs Gatoroid series planned for aging, pop culture match-ups:

• Boy George vs George Michael?
• Brittany Spears vs Christina Aguliera?
• Rihanna vs Alicia Keys?
• Nikki Minaj vs Mariah Carrey?
• One Direction vs Justin Bieber?

Any others? Put them in the comments below. And be thankful there’s a career and a market for aging pop stars to look forward to.

Last Saturday I attended the 2013 Bloomington Writers Festival and Book Fair along with fellow Minnesota Speculative Fiction Writers Group members: Terry Faust, Michael Merriam, Jason D Wittman and Joel Arnold.

We attended the writers festival last year, and we learned that this is not a large event, nor an awesome event for sales of spec fic. “Low maintenance, Low payoff,” is how I reported it to the other MNSpec group organizers. We decided to get a table anyway, and use this event as a practice for developing our marketing/promotional clout for larger events coming this summer.

Some numbers:

• 408 – Registered MNSpec members
• 22 – MNSpec members who RSVPed for the event
• 8 – MNSpec members who actually attended the event, (which includes the 5 members who took turns working the table)
• 3 – Number of books sold
• 1 – Number of MNSpec member facebook/g+/blog posts for this event

That one MNspec member’s promotion for the event? I wrote it. Really thought there would be more promotion than that, but I couldn’t find anything. Please link up any posts that I missed in the comments below.

You Get What You Give

Our book sales were the same as the previous year… you know, back when we didn’t push the promotion quite as hard. LOL. Some might consider the sales numbers a failure, but there’s more to festivals than sales. For example, this event isn’t too bad for networking and promotion. If you have something free to hand out, you’d better bring lots of it. While working the MNSpec table, I gave away many of the writers group info bookmarks that Terry Faust made for us, as well as a lot of my own business cards. Jason D Wittman could hardly keep the table stocked with his very, very, very small (and free) books.

As I wandered through the author and vendor tables, I paid close attention to what tricks authors used to draw attention and what giveaway/bribes they resorted to. Some authors sat at their table playing with their phones while their books gathered dust, while others engaged the crowd. Making eye contact. Drawing people in. Explaining why you would really enjoy their 700-page, unspellchecked, unproofread memoir. I met and talked with many cool and talented Minnesota artists. A special shout out to the following folks for being super-awesome:

• Kristen K Brown – Queen of Stress Relief, and astonishingly positive author of The Happy Hour Effect: 12 Secrets to Minimize Stress and Maximize Life
• Dari McDonald - of Bookmen Media Group, providing Publicity, Promotion, Production and other Publishing needs
• Aimee Kuzenski- Local fiction author whose debut novel “Prisoner of War” will be released soon, and who apparently beats on things with eskrima sticks, so hater-critics beware!
• Lisa Olson – Graphic Designer from Fat Cat Art Studio
• Sybil Smith and Sherry Roberts from the Midwest Independent Publishers Association

I loaded up on free things myself, and came home with a slew of business cards, fliers and adverts.  Then I sifted through them all and did some virtual stalking. The results were interesting. Imagine authors without their own website… Imagine social media “experts” without a presence on google plus…  Imagine thanking people via email and having the email bounce back undeliverable!

All in all I had fun, and met lots of cool local artists. Business cards and handshakes are not my weapons of choice, but I made over a dozen new contacts through the event, and I didn’t get them by sitting in the corner playing with my phone. “Low Maintenance, Low Payoff” is quite different than “No Maintenance, No Payoff.”

This Saturday, 23 March 2013, myself and many other authors from the Minnesota Speculative Fiction Writers Group are attending the Bloomington Writers Festival and Book Fair. We’ll be celebrating stories, the authors who write them, and the readers who enjoy them.

This event is FREE and open to the public, although the seminars and workshops require registration. There will be plenty of freebees handed out. You’ll be able to buy books directly from the authors and have them signed.

See below for more details. I hope to see you there!

Bloomington Writers Festival and Book Fair

10th Annual Celebration of the Arts

March 22-23, 2013

Bloomington Center for the Arts
1800 W Old Shakopee Rd
Bloomington, MN

Friday, March 22 - Master Class with a Master Teacher, Tom Hegg

This four hour workshop is an intense study in creativity and developing authenticity in the written word. Hegg teaches you how to give depth to characters, how to keep their actions and reactions real, and their situations true. $100. Registration deadline, Monday, March 18.

 Saturday, March 23 – Book Fair

9:30 am Keynote Tom Hegg, author of A Cup of Christmas Tea and the children’s book classic series, Peef the Bear. $15

10:30 am – 3:30 am Book Fair and Author Readings, Free and Open to the Public

11:00 am – 5:00 pm Workshops $13

• Getting Started Series includes workshops to stimulate your creativity, personal writing, writing other activities to help you find focus, overcoming writing resistance and writers block and more.
• Telling Your Story Series includes workshops on writing memoirs, turning your journals into stories, writing for children and more.
• Publishing Series includes panels and workshops on preparing your manuscripts, editing options, legal issues and publishing options.
• Marketing and Publicity Series includes workshops that help you get the word out about your book, including preparation of press kits, news releases, use of social media, platform development.
• Arts and Writing Series include workshops on cover design and writing lyrics.

Register early to ensure a spot in the workshop of your choice at www.BTACMN.org or 952-563-8575. Click on arts education or the link under upcoming events for a listing of the workshops and lunch selections.

Lunch orders deadline is Wednesday, March 20, at Midnight.

This program is supported by the Bloomington Theatre and Art Center. www.BTACMN.org

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey is coming to Blu-Ray & DVD on March 19th. To help celebrate the release, Warner Bros. has graciously gifted me a copy of the movie to give away here at conradzero.com! One lucky member of the Cult of Zero will win a copy of the Blu-Ray/DVD/Ultraviolet combo pack of The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey.

Join the Cult of Zero by April 5th, and you not only get a chance to win the Hobbit on Blu-Ray, you’ll also receive the occasional free ebook, newsletter and/or information on how to take over the world. Simply enter your name and email address in the form below before 5 April, 2013 for your chance to win!

 

Join the Cult of Zero to get Free E-books!
Name:
E-mail:

 

Current members of the Cult Of Zero mailing list are automatically enrolled in the drawing. I’ll choose someone from the list at random, and notify them via email. Selected winner has 48 hours to respond with their mailing address, which must be accessible by FedEx or UPS. (NO PO Boxes!) If there is no response/address provided within 48 hours, I’ll pick another winner. Good luck!

While you’re waiting, check out The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey Blog App below. Take the quiz to see if you are 100% Hobbit and see if you can beat my score of 88% on the first try.