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Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Video Game Review: Portal

When my monitor of almost ten freaking years went kitty-wompus, I saved my pennies and splurged on a nice 22-inch LCD monitor. Of course I was eager for something to test it out.

Sifting through my pile of unfinished video games, I came across Portal, a member of Valve's Orange Box. Wicked addictive fun, it was; and from what I read after completing the game, it drew higher praise than the other components of the Orange Box.

Portal is a puzzle-style game. Your character doesn't have a truly offensive weapon, simply a Portal Gun, which opens teleport planes to allow you to move things (most importantly yourself) from place to place. The physics of the game are great fun, and often necessary to solve the puzzles and advance to the next test area.

The best part of the game is the dialog of the computer construct which tutors you as you go through the various 'tests'. The dialog for the game is as quotable as any good movie. Reprinting it here does not do it justice. The affect and tone are just as important as the lines. The promises of "cake" for completing puzzles is hysterical.

I won't spoil the ending, and I won't tell you if there truly is cake at the end, but there is a song that is quite funny. The game took me about 6 hours total to finish.

Thanks much to Saveau for the Portal tip. It was a great distraction and a good test for my new monitor.

Art Is Resistance
-Zero

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Posted by Zero3:33 AM
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Conrad Zero - Minneapolis Musician Author and Demonologist

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